Gratitude: Is What We Have, All There Is?
Gratitude is one of those words that prompts us to be thankful, which begs the question, “Is what we have all there is?” We appreciate our health, hearths and homes, and this is as it should be, considering the lopsided, inverted world we live in. We can choose a different world, however, one in which raised consciousness is the norm, not the exception, and these necessities of life are a given. I like this idea, it is tangible, and once our eyes are open to it, we expand. Expansion brings purpose.
I do not recall an explanation or definition of purpose growing up, and honestly, I did not provide insight into it while I raised my children. I mentioned parenthood gives us purpose, though. I suppose we could argue that parenthood is a soul’s life purpose for many exclusively, but I would argue we are sovereign beings and as such have individualized purposes beyond parenting, if only we could apprehend, understand and live them. What is purpose, and how do we know we found it?
To understand our purpose, it is necessary to understand ourselves, and self-awareness is apparent after introspection. This can be daunting and frightening because it is not something we usually do unless we have a traumatic experience. Even then, we may ignore it and press on. We are programmed to do so, and we follow it unconsciously. We all have a shadow side, too. It is not to be feared or hated; it seeks our understanding and integration. There are as many paths to self as there are people, so we need to choose one and begin the walk, knowing one path may lead to another and then another until we come to a place of reconciliation with ourselves, acceptance.
Acceptance leads to self-love, and this…this is a joyous state of being. To look in the mirror and love what we see is a blessing, one that brings richness and fullness to life and an outpouring of love to others as well. Self-love brings our truth; grounded in it, nothing disrupts us, and we speak it freely with resolve and confidence in our knowing. With truth comes purpose. We know our purpose when we know our truth.
My purpose is writing stories that support a new paradigm, one that revolves around a service to others mindset. Gratitude? It is energy that fuels our purpose, it supports us through life’s challenges so we can maintain our balance while we fulfill it.
xox
It is much easier to write about myself in the context of a story, but I will give it a go here and hope for the best. I miss New England springs. The air is crisp with a hint of warmth, sweater weather, and I remember the lovely collection of them I had throughout my childhood and adolescence. Daffodils and tulips pop up dramatically because they are eager to display their beauty after months underground. I do not miss northern winters, and I still recall the mornings I sat on top of heating vents to stay warm. New England at mid-life is romantic: cozy cottages on Cape Cod, brownstones in Boston, fall’s canopy of colors and historical homes whose stories capture my imagination. These images are what is left of my life there.
Many years were spent moving hither and yon, and I dreaded it, but adjusted, settled in and learned to appreciate what was offered in those communities I called home. Living a transient life did have its perks, including the choice to sit back and observe life. I did a lot of this, storing sound bites and pictures in long term memory. They lay dormant, and perhaps one day they will be used in a story. We made our home in Virginia, and it was there I stopped observing and participated.
I began working with students with special needs and came to understand that they were the teachers, which was a humbling experience. I had many lessons to learn over the ten years we shared a classroom. Even now when I look back I hope they know I love them and tried my best to love them while they were with me. I still teach, but my students are different. They endear themselves to me nonetheless. I have said, “They keep me young,” but I’m beginning to feel my age and wonder how much longer I will be able to keep up with them.
I have three grown children who are my closest friends and confidants. It was easy to be their mother; though at times they tested limits, they helped shape me into a well rounded woman, and I am a better person for having reared them. I have grandchildren too, lovely cherubs whose smiles bring joy and tears, and when I watch my daughters with their babies, I am filled with pride and admiration for them. These emotions are one of the many gifts of grandparenting. It is an amazing experience, but it is much more. It is an opportunity to be a shining star, a loving example of humanity, and it is my desire to be these for them.